Tiny Quinoa Nutbutter Cookies

 These are probably my favorite GF cookie of all time.  The original source was the Ancient Harvest Quinoa Flakes box.  In the last few years, those quinoa flakes have been harder to find and have gotten very expensive.  But, for these cookies, it's well worth the price. 

The last box I bought didn't seem to have the recipe on the box, so here is my variation on it. My modifications: mixed nut butters instead of peanut butter, different sweeteners, real butter, add xanthan gum, weights instead of measures, cookie size, and some changes to directions

Alas, no photo.  Just use your imagination.  They look like.... cookies. 

Ingredients

170 g total of maple syrup, honey, and/or agave (1/2 cup)

68 g organic cane sugar or raw sugar (1/3 cup) Optional: Substitute about 8-10 grams molasses

112 g organic butter (1 stick)

128 g total mix of cashew, almond, and sunflower butters (1/2 cup) 

1 tsp vanilla

140 g brown rice flour (1 cup)  Can substitute part sorghum or other grainy flour

83 g quinoa flakes (3/4 cup)

1 tsp baking soda

¼ tsp salt (more if butter is unsalted)

¼ to ½ tsp xanthan gum (optional)

55 g chopped nuts (1/2 cup) (Optional. See notes.)

 

Directions

 Oven: 350 (f)

Yield: About 90 tiny cookies

1.       Beat first 5 ingredients together until creamy.

2.       Combine remaining ingredients except nuts.

3.       Mix creamed and dry ingredients, then fold in nuts.

4.       Chill for about ½ hour or more to make dough easier to work with. 

5.       Line cookie sheets with parchment.

6.       Roll dough into 8 g balls, flatten slightly, and place on cookie sheet about 1” to 1.5” apart.

7.       Bake 350 for 7-10 minutes, until cookies are lightly brown on bottom.

8.       Let cookies sit on cookie sheet for 2 minutes, then move them to racks to cool.

 

Notes & Tips:

·         Pecans are the best nut to use, especially if you use more maple syrup and less honey/agave.

·         Use 1/3 cup each nuts and mini dairy-free chocolate chips.

·         Use 1/4 cup chopped coconut shreds, ¼ cup chopped pecans, and 1/3 cup mini chocolate chips.

·         If you must measure instead of weigh, oil the measuring cup before you put nut butter or honey/agave/maple in it.

·         Weighing the cookie dough makes the cookies a more even size, which helps them bake more evenly.

·         Consider dipping the bottom of the cookie balls in almond meal before putting them on the cookie sheet. Then use a sugared fork to flatten them, as you would peanut butter cookies.

Gluten-free Cranberry Bliss-ish Bars

Often, instead of developing my own recipe, I'll redevelop someone else's. There are already several GF versions of cranberry bliss bars out there, so it's not like the world needs another one. Or, maybe the world does. You can never have too much bliss, right?

I started with Cookin' Diva's glutenacious recipe on Food.com. I took her suggestion to reduce the sugar, and instead of regular white and brown, I used a combo of organic sugar and molasses. I used my new favorite GF blend, Premium Gold. I added a pinch more xanthan gum than was already in the flour, plus a pinch more baking powder than the recipe called for.  Then, to further lower the sugar count as well as the effort, I skipped the melted white chocolate on top and the grated orange rind.

For the bars:

2 sticks very soft butter

188 grams organic sugar

12 grams molasses

3 large eggs

2 tsp orange extract

224 grams Premium Gold flour blend or GF flour blend of choice 

a pinch of xanthan gum (more if your GF blend does not already include it)

1 3/4 tsp baking powder

1 tsp ground ginger

scant 1/2 tsp salt

3/4 cup dried cranberries, lightly chopped if not already sliced/chopped

3/4 cup dairy free or regular white chocolate chips

Frosting:

2 ounces vegan or regular cream cheese

18 grams butter

1/2 tsp vanilla

1/2 tsp orange extract

200-230 grams organic powdered sugar

optional: 2 tsp - 1 tbsp non-dairy creamer or milk

Topping:

Extra dried cranberries, sliced or chopped

Make the bars:

1. Preheat the oven to 350, line a 10X15 jelly roll pan with parchment, then spray the parchment with coconut oil. 
2. Mix butter, sugar, and molasses in stand mixer or with hand mixer until light and fluffy.
3. Add eggs one at a time to incorporate,
4. Add extract.
5. Mix flour blend, xanthan gum, baking powder, ginger, and salt in a small bowl.
6. Add dry ingredients to butter/sugar mixture to incorporate.
7. Fold in cranberries and white chocolate. 
8. Spread evenly in prepared pan and bake for 18-22 minutes, just until edges are lightly browned and toothpick comes out clean. Don't overbake.

Frosting and Topping:

1. Using a hand mixer, mix cream cheese and butter in medium bowl until fluffy. 
2. Add extracts and incorporate.
3. Gradually add sugar, mixing until smooth, light, and fluffy. Add creamer if needed to get a spreadable consistency.
4. Spread frosting over cooled bars, then sprinkle cranberries on top. 
5. Cut into bars or triangles. 

To freeze: Put one layer of bars in the container, then freeze a few minutes to harden the frosting. Put a layer of wax paper on top, then another layer of bars. Repeat until the container is full.  

To serve: Remove frozen bars to a plate, then let thaw for a few minutes. Do not thaw bars while they are stacked in the freezer container. 

 

German Chocolate Quinoa Cookies

I really call these "Oops Cookies".  I accidentally got the nut butter mixture too hot, and the chocolate chips mostly melted. 

Oops! 

Sometimes a thing that initially seems bad can turn out to be surprisingly good.  So maybe I should call them "Redemption Cookies".

But, rule one of putting your cookie recipes on your blog is, "Make the name make sense to others."  So, with flavors of coconut, pecan, and chocolate, maybe it's best to call them German Chocolate Cookies.

Ingredients:

138 grams total of maple syrup, honey, and agave syrup (1/2 cup)
68 grams organic cane sugar (1/2 cup)
1 4-ounce stick of Earth Balance margarine or organic butter
128 grams total of almond butter and cashew butter (1/2 cup)
1 tsp vanilla
140 grams brown rice flour (1 cup)
83 grams quinoa flakes  (3/4 cup)
1 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp sea salt
Scant 1/4 cup chopped pecans
Scant 1/4 cup shredded coconut, chopped
1/3 cup dairy-free miniature chocolate chips (e.g., Enjoy Life)

Directions:

1. Add first 4 ingredients into a medium steel mixing bowl, then place over a pan of simmering water to soften.
2. Mix brown rice flour, quinoa flakes, baking soda, salt, pecans, coconut, and chocolate chips in a small mixing bowl.
3. When nut butter mixture is very warm, add vanilla and stir until everything is smooth.
4. Remove nut butter mixture from heat and stir in the flour mixture.  Combine well.  The chocolate chips will mostly melt. 
5. Place in refrigerator until firm enough to handle (about 30-40 minutes).
6. Roll into small balls (about 12 grams each) and place on lightly greased cookie sheet about 2" apart. 
7. Bake at 350 until lightly browned but still soft in the middle (about 8 minutes)
8. Let rest on cookie sheet for 2 minutes, the place on wire racks to cool.

Makes about 60 cookies.

GF Ginger-Cashew Brownies

These brownies are largely based on Roben Ryberg's rice flour brownies, so they're bound to be delicious and easy.  If you don't have one of her cookbooks, you're missing out.

These brownies are fudgey, spicy, and just gooey enough.

Gluten-free Ginger-Cashew Brownies

 Ingredients
4 ounces organic butter, melted & cooled.
54 g sorghum flour
70 g brown rice flour
200 g organic cane sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp xanthan gum
1 tsp ground ginger
2 eggs, beaten
3-4 Tbsp candied ginger
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips (Enjoy Life brand), divided. (Or more.)
1/4 to 1/3 cup chopped cashews
Cinnamon-sugar mixture

Directions

1. Grease a 9" square pan with coconut oil and heat the toaster (or real) oven to 350.
2. Gently melt butter in a double boiler or a small pan.  Do not microwave.
3. Mix flours, sugar, salt, xanthan, and ginger in a medium mixing bow with a wire whisk.
4. Sprinkle the candied ginger with a little of the flour mixture, then mince finely. You should have about 2 Tbsp when done.  Set aside.
5. Mix the butter and egg into the flour mixture, then stir in the ginger and half the chocolate chips.  The mixture will thick.
6. Dump the brownie mixture into the pan. Dampen your fingers and use them to pat the brownie mixture into the pan. Re-dampen fingers as needed, but don't drown the brownies.
7. Sprinkle remaining chocolate chips and the cashews evenly over the top, then press down a little so they stay put.  Sprinkle with as much cinnamon-sugar as you like, but don't go crazy.
8. Bake about 30-35 minutes, til a toothpick comes out clean.  Cool on wire rack and cut into 12-16 squares. 

 Sorry, no picture.  They look like brownies with slightly toasted cashew pieces on top.

Adventures in Leftover Relish, Part 1

I won't speak of the half turkey Spouse 1.0 and I were left with after our Thanksgiving guests had departed.  That's another story.

Instead, let's talk about cranberry relish.

There are probably at least 100 ideas for using leftover cranberry sauce out there. Many of them say something like, "Pour relish over goat cheese for a lovely appetizer."

Sorry, cranberry sauce over goat cheese is one of the myriad leftovers I'm trying to use up.

Or, "Use it in muffins". Did that. Last year. Didn't like it.

And, all the recipes talk about ways to use up normal cranberry relish.  Well, one of the tubs of leftover relish is kinda normal: Raw cran-apple-orange relish. 

But.

None of the 100 ways to use up leftover cranberry sauce talk about what to do with a tub of leftover cranberry salsa.  Yummy, yummy stuff. But, even Spouse 1.0's love of cranberry salsa can't get it used up before it rots.

So, I was on my own for what to do with my two tubs of leftover relish.

I decided to make jam bars with the tub of cran-apple-orange relish. 

Funny thing about jam bar recipes: When I had absolutely no interest in making jam bars, it seemed like every GF cookbook, magazine, and blog had a GF jam bar recipe.  But, when I went to look through my dozens of cookbooks & mags, and hundreds of printouts from blogs, no jam bar recipe. Except for dear old Roben Ryberg's cookie cookbook.  But, her recipe didn't use oats.  I wanted a jam bar recipe that used oats.

So, I pulled out my trusty, albeit glutenacious, Better Homes cookbook. And, there it was: A nice, oaty bar cookie recipe that was exactly what I was looking for.  Started converting that bad boy to GF. Yeah.

And. I couldn't find the GF oats.  I'd kind of re-arranged and tidied and generally hidden things for Thanksgiving. My GF oats were somewhere underneath and behind who-knows-what. Luckily, the quinoa flakes were handy. So, Quinoa Flake Cran-Apple-Orange Doncha-Just-Relish-Them Jam Bars it is.

Ingredients:

1 1/4 to 1 1/2 cup leftover cran-apple-orange relish
About 1-2 tsp potato starch
100 grams GF blend flour of choice (about 3/4 cup)
28 grams cashew meal or blanched almond meal (about 1/4 cup)
110 grams quinoa flakes (1 cup)
160 grams organic cane sugar (2/3 cup)
3/4 tsp xanthan gum
1/4 tsp baking soda
4 oz butter, softened (1/2 cup)
Optional: 1/4 to 1/3 cup chopped walnuts

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 and lightly spritz a 9" square pan with coconut oil spray.
2. Heat relish in a small saucepan until it starts to boil a little. Remove from heat, let partially cool, and sprinkle on the potato starch. Stir and let cool while you do everything else.
3. Make crust by mixing dry ingredients, then working in the butter with your fingertips. 
4. Reserve 1/2 cup lightly packed of the crust mixture.
5. Press remaining crust mixture into the pan.
6. Spread the relish mixture over the crust mixture.
7. Add nuts to the reserved crust mixture, then sprinkle over everything.
8. Bake about 1/2 hour until the top is golden. Cool, cut into bars, and enjoy.

Heavily adapted from the Fruit-filled Oatmeal Bars recipe in Better Homes and Gardens New Cookbook, 10th edition.
 

They went fast.

Applecado Bread (Gluten free, of course)

It's no secret that I'm a huge fan of Roben Ryberg's books, especially You Won't Believe It's Gluten-Free.  And, a sane person might wonder, "Well, if you love Ryberg's recipes so much, why do you keep changing them???"

Good question.  All I can say is, there's something in me that must explore. Experiment. Try new (aka, "weird") things.  I just must.

Ask my sister. She's the one who was traumatized by a chocolate mint birthday cake when she was a child.  She recalls it being very minty.  It might explain why neither of us is much of a fan of mint these days.  It was not a successful experiment.

But, some experiments are.  Take, for instance, applecado bread.  This one is based heavily on a Ryberg recipe, so you know I'm starting with something good. And, I'm including avocado.  Also something good. And goat milk, ginger, cloves, bourbon vanilla, and more cinnamon.  All very good things.  As my sister-in-law says, "When you put good things together, you get a good thing."

Applecado bread: It's a good thing.

Wet ingredients:

• 6 ounces organic, unsweetened applesauce
• 100 grams organic sugar
• 2.6 ounces avocado (a little less than one small one)
• 1 ounce goat milk
• 2 organic eggs
• 1 tsp vanilla

Dry ingredients:

• 150 grams brown rice flour
• 1 tbsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 3/4 tsp xanthan gum
• 1 tsp apple cider vinegar
• 1/2 tsp cinnamon plus an extra shake or two
• 1/8 tsp ginger, slightly rounded
• 1/8 tsp cloves
• 1/2 tsp sea salt

Topping:

• 1/3 to 1/2 cup chopped pecans

Directions:

1. Spray an 8" baking pan with coconut oil spray, then sprinkle a little almond meal on the bottom.  Or, line the pan with parchment paper.  Preheat oven to 350 (f)
2. Mix the wet ingredients in a medium mixing bowl until everything is nice and fluffy and uniformly green. I used my stick blender.
3. Whisk dry ingredients together thoroughly in a small mixing bowl.
4. Gently fold the dry into the wet until everything is nicely incorporated.  The batter will be fluffy and beautiful -- in a green sort of way.
5. Pour batter into the baking pan, smooth out a little, and top with pecans.  Gently press the pecans in so they'll stay put.  
6. Bake at 350 (f) for about 30 minutes, until the house smells lovely and a toothpick test tells you the bread done.

Blue Cornmeal Poppyseed Cookies

A while back, I saw a recipe for blue corn poppyseed cookies on the Bob's Red Mill site.  I was so excited to find yet another blue cornmeal cookie recipe that I didn't notice that it was ... a normal flour recipe. Blech.

Every time I leafed through my printouts of cookie recipes, there it was... Blue corn poppyseed cookies. The momentary excitement. The immediate disappointment. Oh, yeah. Gluten. Blech.

In December I finally got around to converting the recipe. I'm gaining confidence in my ability to do that. Sorta.  Trial #1: Use the GF King Arthur flour a friend had sent. Add a half teaspon xanthan gum.

Yeah, I know.  Bob has his own GF blend. Surely he wouldn't approve of my using King Arthur flour in Bob's recipe.  Had Mr. Red Mill have been there, he no doubt would have laughed when the cookies came out buttery, yummy, and... well... kind of powdery. (See, that's what you get for using some other guy's flour.)

So, a couple of weeks ago, it was time to branch out and start using my own flours. Much better.  Still maybe a little powdery, but kind of addicting, nonetheless.


Blue Cornmeal Poppyseed Cookies
(Adapted from Bob's Red Mill)

Dry ingredients

2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp sea salt*
1 cup blue cornmeal
1/4 cup brown rice flour
3 TBSP white rice flour (or more brown rice)
1/4 cup potato starch
1/8 cup tapioca starch
3 TBSP almond meal
1/2 tsp xanthan gum
1/3 cup poppy seeds

Wet ingredients

1/2 cup cold butter*
3/4 cup raw turbinado sugar
2 eggs, beaten
1 tsp vanilla

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 375(f) and grease cookie sheets.
2. Mix dry ingredients thoroughly in a small mixing bowl.
3. Cream butter and sugar in a medium mixing bowl.
4. Add eggs & vanilla and mix well.
5. Add dry ingredients.
6. Chill dough for at least 1/2 hour.
7. If you're going to make cut out cookies, roll out between sheets of plastic wrap, cut, and place on cookie sheets. Otherwise, just shape into small balls, place on cookie sheets, then flatten.
8. Brush tops of cookies with beaten egg (optional).
9. Bake at 375 for 6-10 minutes, depending on the size of the cookies and type of pan.

* If using salted butter, cut back on the salt to about 1/8 tsp.

The dough can be a bit sticky and tricky to use for rolled and cut cookies.  

GF Ice Box Cookies, Take 1

A couple of weeks ago I was thinking about my dear departed friend Alice.  Alice is the one who introduced me to the joys of cornmeal lemon cookies.

Thoughts of Alice often lead to thoughts of cookies.

This time, my thoughts turned towards ice box cookies.  They had a rounded oblong shape and were fairly thick. Maybe a quarter of an inch or three-eighths. Brown and drab.  I vaguely remembered walnuts.

They weren't my favorites.  Chocolate chip cookies probably held that place of honor back then. What teenage girl can resist chocolate?  My other favorite would have been peanut butter. Or, better yet, peanut butter topped with a Hershey's Kiss.  Creamy white snickerdoodles with their spicy dusting of cinnamon and, of course, sunny yellow cornmeal lemon cookies would have rounded out my top five.

I have no idea why, after all these years, I should develop a yearning for drab, brown icebox cookies. But, I did.

And thus began the quest.

Job one: Find Alice's recipe. Not in my huge stack of recipes dating back to the '70's. But, fortunately, a Modesto friend had the recipe, and she was kind enough to facebook it to me.

Job two: Convert to gluten free. 

Which also means converting from cups to grams -- at least for the flour.  Lots of variation out there on flour weights.  The best guess: 3 cups of flour » 375 grams.

Also, lots of variation out there on proportions. One source said to use 50% starch, 50% grain.  Another said 30% starch, 70% grain.  Yet another recommends up to 10% bean.  Another, up to 10% nut.

I decided to go » 30/70 for a baseline, using tapioca starch, potato starch, sorghum, and brown rice.

The next consideration is xanthan gum. I think the rule of thumb is 1/4 tsp per cup of flour for cookies.

So, the first draft looks something like this:

GF Alice's Ice Box Cookies


60 grams tapioca starch
60 grams potato starch
125 grams sorghum flour
130 grams brown rice flour
1 teaspoon cream of tartar
Pinch of salt
1 teaspoon baking soda

2 cups organic dark brown sugar
1 cup Spectrum organic shortening
1 teaspoon bourbon vanilla
2 eggs
1 cup chopped walnuts

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Lightly grease cookie sheets.

Mix dry ingredients together until well-blended
Cream shortening; add sugar, beaten eggs, vanilla. Add dry to the wet mixture. Add nuts. Mix thoroughly. Make into long rolls about 2" in diameter. Place in refrigerator to chill for a couple of hours.

OK, so these logs look slightly less appetizing than cookie logs should. Carry on... In the end, it's about how the cookies taste, not how looked along the way.

Slice thin and bake in 400 degree oven until lightly browned -- 5 to 10  minutes depending on diameter of your rolls and thickness of your slices.

Results:

A bit disappointing. I quickly realized that when you make your cookies smaller than Alice's, you need to bake them for a shorter period of time.

They spread out a bit more than they should have, and had a bit too much of a caramelized sugar texture.

Having said that, they've gotten pretty positive reviews from folks eating them.  I guess, so long as I don't expect them to be Alice's, they are enjoyable enough.

Next time:

Try a bit more xanthan gum?
Use part organic turbinado rather than dark brown sugar?
Up the flour to 400 grams?
Add a little bean or some other high protein flour?
Use part sweet rice flour for some of the starch?

GF Avocado Bread

OK, so avocado bread doesn't really qualify as easy. Or healthy. But, converting my mom's old avocado bread recipe to GF was easier than expected.  

You read so much about how persnickety the GF flours are compared to wheat (they are), and how getting the right amount of xanthan gum is almost as much art as it is science (it is).

Add the fact that the moisture content of fresh, natural fruits and vegs can vary widely. Yup, you've got a recipe for potential disaster.

But, fortunately, this time disaster did not strike. 

This was Mom's recipe:

3/4 C shortening
2 C sugar
3 eggs
2 C sifted flour
3 tsp cinnamon
3/4 tsp salt
3/4 tsp allspice
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 1/2 C pureed avocado
3/4 C buttermilk
1/2 C chopped walnuts
3/4 C raisins
Corn syrup
Another 1/2 C chopped walnuts

1. Add sugar slowly to shortening, beating until light and fluffy.
2. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each.
3. Sift dry ingredients together.
4. Fold dry ingredients into wet ingredients.
5. Add avocado and buttermilk.
6. Add walnuts and raisins.
7. Pour batter into 2 greased and floured loaf pans.
8. Bake at 350 for 60-65 minutes.
9. Brush with corn syrup, top with nuts, and broil until bubbly.

 Mom's avocado bread was exceedingly yummy.  She pretty much only made it at Christmas.

I was kind of missing her, and I had some rapidly fading avocados that needed to be used up.  I'd been wanting to try converting a standard recipe to something we could eat.  So, it was time.

With our dietary restrictions, substitutions beyond the usual GF ones were required:

• Obviously, no wheat flour for the Spouse.  Substitute brown rice flour, tapioca starch, and potato starch.
• Xanthan gum. That one is tricky.  I remember seeing a guideline for "If you're cooking this, use this much per cup of flour."  I couldn't find that in my books. So, I decided to go with the oft heard 1 tsp per cup of flour, and hope for the best.
• No white sugar. Use raw.
• No pasteurized cow's milk (including buttermilk). But, we can have Greek yogurt.
• No corn for David, so substitute agave syrup. 
• Neither of us likes raisins, so substitute dates.
• Butter is a little cheaper than organic shortening, and I feel better about butter. So, use 1/2 butter and half shortening

Also, a couple of small changes in the procedure were in order:

• I only have 1 loaf pan, so use one loaf pan and one 9" square pan
• GF stuff likes parchment paper. So, with the 9" pan I used parchment. I experimented with shortening and almond meal for the loaf pan.
• Baking took lots longer than expected.

So, the ingredient list now looks like this:

6 Tbsp organic shortening
6 Tbsp butter
2 C raw sugar
3 organic eggs
1 C brown rice flour
1/2 C potato starch
1/2 C tapioca starch
2 tsp xanthan gum
3 tsp cinnamon
3/4 tsp salt
3/4 tsp allspice
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 1/2 C pureed or mashed avocado
3/4 C Greek yogurt
1/2 C chopped walnuts
3/4 C raisins
Agave syrup
A fistful or two of chopped walnuts

And, now the procedure looks like this:

1. Add raw sugar to shortening and butter, beating until it's as light and fluffy as raw sugar and fat can get.
2. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each.
3. Mix dry ingredients together thoroughly.
4. Fold dry ingredients into wet ingredients.
5. Add avocado and yogurt.
6. Add walnuts and dates.
7. Pour batter into 1 greased and almond-mealed loaf pan and one parchment-lined 9" square pan. (Mine are glass.)
8. Bake at 350 for 60-65 minutes. Then bake another 10 minutes. Then lower the heat to 325 and keep baking until a toothpick comes out reasonably clean.
9. Brush with agave syrup, top with nuts, and bake or broil a little longer -- until bubbly if you're broiling.

 The results were: Not like mom's. 

 

Of course, brown rice flour is way grittier than wheat flour.  Next time, I might try using sorghum or a combination of brown rice and oat flour, plus the tapioca and potato to try to get the texture a little closer to home.  And, the yogurt just didn't have quite the tang of buttermilk. I could try a tiny bit of apple cider vinegar mixed into the wet ingredients to give it a little more kick.

 

The other thing is that the xanthan gum makes the mess pretty hard to mix by the time you add the avocado. You risk burning out your hand mixer (or your hands) by the time you add the nuts and dates. The more you mix, the harder it gets to mix.  Thus, the fruits and nuts didn't get incorporated evenly.  So, next time I think I'll add the avocado and yogurt to the wet ingredients before adding the dry ingredients.

 

But, despite all that, it was pretty good, in its own GF way. I'd definitely make it again.

 

 

 

 

Vanillascotch Pudding

Yup, I continue my quest for an easy and perfect pudding.

For now, I'm giving up on the crock pot chocolate pudding.  I think I'm finally strong enough to stir a 4-serving recipe on the stove, and the extra work hauling out and washing the crock pot is no longer mitigated by being able to spread the stirring out.

I'll still crock pot the tapioca. It's not as high-maintenance as chocolate.

So, hurray for stove-top chocolate pudding.  But, woman does not live by chocolate pudding alone, or even chocolate with periodic bouts of tapioca.  I need butterscotch.

Luckily, there are recipes for butterscotch out there. So, last week I decided to make butterscotch pudding.

Of course, I can't leave well enough alone. I can't even leave "well enough except for substituting almond milk" alone.

First change: Just say no to processed sugar -- even brown sugar. Raw demerara. About 1/4 what the recipe calls for. And, add a tiny bit of molasses to provide extra brown-ness to the raw sugar.

Next change: Substitute 1/4 date sugar for brown, just because I have it on hand, and just because it's novel.

Third: Leave out the other half of  the sugar. Add some liquid stevia.

Use 1/2 the butter the recipe calls for.  Never mind the fact that this is supposed to be butterscotch. Who needs all that fat?

No corn starch. Arrowroot.

And, of course, almond milk instead of cow's.

Now, add a little extra vanilla to make up for all the flavor lost by cutting back on sugar and fat and such.

Not really butterscotch. Not really vanilla. Vanillascotch.

Results: Don't try this at home, kids.  It's ugly. The date sugar doesn't dissolve, leaving it grainy. It's not bad while it's still warm, and it's even edible when cold. But, who wants not-bad edibility for dessert?

Arm-Friendly Chocolate Pudding

I've googled the whole earth over trying to find a crock pot chocolate pudding recipe.  Chocolate pudding cake, yeah. Chocolate pudding, no.  Found one (and only one) for tapioca, but no chocolate.

Maybe it's because pudding really does require stirring, and people just expect to put stuff in the crock pot, go off and run errands for a few hours, and come home to find their food perfectly done.

People also expect crock pots to be forgiving of a little too much cooking time.  Crock pot tapioca taught me that the window of forgiveness for desserts is much narrower than the window of forgiveness for chicken or beef.

But, surely crock potting chocolate pudding is better than having your arms fall off from stirring.  So, here it is, quite possibly the world's first crock pot chocolate pudding recipe. Almost certainly the world's first dairy-free, corn-free, gluten-free, low-sugar crock pot pudding to be published on Blogspot.

Equipment:

4 or 5 quart crock pot
Silicone spatula
Silicone wire whisk
Assorted measuring devices

Ingredients:

1/2 C unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 C potato starch
1/2 C raw cane sugar
Dash salt
Microscopic dash of cinnamon
4 C almond milk
Splash of vanilla
1/2 T butter or soy margarine or other fatty substance (opt.)
About 16 drops liquid stevia

Directions:
 
Whisk all the dry stuff together until the potato starch is well incorporated.
Add all the wet stuff except the fat and stevia.
Whisk to incorporate.
Turn the crock pot on high.
Every 20 - 30 minutes perform the following stirring ritual:

• Whisk
• Stir with spatula, getting the goo off the bottom and sides
• Whisk again to incorporate the goo

After about an hour or hour and and a half, turn the crock pot on low. Go run an errand for about an hour.
Add the fat, then perform the stirring ritual.

Check to see if the pudding is getting to be about the thickness of tomato sauce or somewhere between chocolate sauce and pudding. If it's not yet nearly pudding-like, then just cook it on low a bit longer, periodically doing the stirring ritual.

When it is nearly pudding-like, turn the crock pot off.
Go run another errand for another hour and a half or so. 
Add the stevia, then perform the stirring ritual one more time.
Package it into single-serve cups, or just dump it all in a bowl and chill.

G-Free, Dairy Free, Low Sugar Chocolate Pudding

When I was little, my mom would sometimes make chocolate pudding. She may have used a mix, but back then "mixes" saved you about 60% of the measuring, but only about 10% of the work.

You still had to stir the mix into the milk to dissolve it, and then stand stirring and stirring over a hopefully low enough heat to keep it from burning.  You'd almost certainly still end up with a few lumps.  And, it still required a certain amount of skill and intuition to know when the pudding was done.

You'd pour the pudding into dessert bowls, and a skin would form over the top as it cooled.  Sometimes people would put wax paper over the top of the pudding to keep the skin from forming -- a real travesty, because the coolest part (at least for a kid) was eating that weird stretchy chocolatey skin.

You'd almost never let it cool all the way because the kids were just too eager to eat the pudding. 

The kids would fight over who got to lick the spoon and who got to glean the pudding stuck to the pan. A smart mom would never, ever use a rubber spatula to get all the pudding out of the pan, because then a real fight would ensue. 

Now, pudding is made by Jello and comes in little pre-measured cups. You can get normal, fat-free, and sugar-free.

But, you can't get dairy-free, G-free, white sugar - free, and chemical sweetener-free.

So, last night I made pudding.

And, only an uber foodie chef wannabe would be foolhardy enough to call it easy. But, it was good.  Very reminiscent of the stuff Mom used to make, except almond milk doesn't form that cool stretchy skin.

Recipe:

1/4 C unsweetened cocoa powder
2 T potato starch
1/4 C raw cane sugar
Dash salt
2 C almond milk
Splash of vanilla
About 12 drops liquid stevia

Mix all the dry stuff in a pan with a wire whisk. Then add the wet stuff (except the stevia) and whisk until you're deluded into thinking everything's all blended and smooth.

Heat it all over a very low fire, and stir with a wire whisk until you start worrying about the whisk not reaching the edges of the bottom of the pan. Stir with a silicon spatula until you start worrying about the spatula not getting the center bottom of the pan. Switch to a steel spoon.

Keep stirring, periodically switching your stirring tool, until your arms fall off and the husband (or kiddies) smell the chocolate and start asking if it's done yet.

Stir some more, until it starts burbling like molten lava.  Cook and stir just a bit more. Then stir in the stevia.

Let it cool long enough to keep it from melting your plastic containers. Or, use glass.

Reserve the spoon, pan, and other stirring implements for yourself, for he who stirreth not, licketh not.

Makes 4 1/2 cup servings.

Pudding!

When we were courting, Dave & I had a bit of an adventure when his brakes gave out on some twisty windy dirt road in the Sierras. He told me about a movie he'd seen (or book he'd read) where the characters were supposed to be having adventures. Unfortunately, one of them didn't really know what an adventure was. So, the guy that did know what an adventure was told him that he would alert him to an adventure in progress by saying "Pudding" whenever they were having one.

This whole dietary change-up is definitely an adventure.

The latest adventure is... what to eat when my now-forbidden stash of artificially sweetened, cow-milk-based little cuplets of Jello pudding are all gone? 

I've been worrying about this more as my supply has steadily dwindled. 

So, yesterday I bought a bag of tapioca, thinking I'd do something rice-pudding-like with tapioca and almond milk. I dutifully googled tapioca pudding recipes, only to find they involved constant stirring. 

I'm doing this dietary adventure primarily in the hopes of bringing healing to my hands. Using my few remaining hand points for endless stirring of tapioca seemed to defeat the purpose.

Then... Behold!  A crock pot tapioca pudding recipe!  Woo Hoo!

Some reasonable substitutions and additions, and now I have Pudding!

The original recipe is here:
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Slow-Cooker-Tapioca-Pudding/Detail.aspx

My variation:

• 1/2 cup small pearl tapioca
• 3/4 cup water, more or less
• 3 1/2 cups almond milk (the 60 calorie/cup kind)
• 2 T raw sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 T organic whipping cream or coconut based coffee creamer
• 1 t vanilla
• 6-8 drops liquid stevia
• a dash or two of fresh ground nutmeg

Soak the tapioca in the water for an hour or two. Mix the eggs in a separate bowl. Dump everything except the stevia & the nutmeg in the crockpot, and whisk together. Cook on low for however long it takes. Mine took about 3 or 4 hours. Periodically stir/whisk the mixture... increasing from about once per hour at first to about once every 20 minutes near the end.  If the tapioca gets too thick before the pearls get translucent, add  a drizzle of water or almond milk.

When the pudding's done, whisk in the liquid stevia and the fresh nutmeg.

The almond milk is a bit sweet, so you don't need as much sugar as the original recipe requires.  Do not use powdered stevia. It's gross.